For whatever reason, no one else in the swim class showed up.
I’d had this student, we’ll call him Sam, only once or twice before. He was about 10, normal height, and a novice in the pool. Level 3 – learning the basic strokes of swimming. I was standing in the 3’-4’ section of water.
Sam came to the edge of the pool as the clock’s longest hand touched the twelve.
Big smile, “hello!”
“Hi Sam! Why don’t you hop on in and give me 10 bobs.”
Gladly, without any fuss, he bobbed up and down under the water, submerging his head. I asked him to show me his strokes so I could assess how much he had remembered over the holidays.
“Freestyle (aka -crawl stroke, arm over arm).”
“Next, back stroke.”
“Float.”
“Breast Stroke… ok, we’ll stop here.”
We definitely had enough to work on with the first two strokes. Sam was willing and compliant, but lacked confidence.
We began with freestyle.
“Okay Sam, let me see your freestyle stroke.”
He dutifully pushed off from the side of the pool, feet kicking, arms windmilling through the water, with his face fully upright. Every few strokes, he’d stand up, wipe is face and start again.
He made his way to the line of buoys that divided the lanes and turned around. Sam headed back to me, same style – kicking feet, arms one at a time slicing through the water, head erect.
“Sam, we’re going to start back at the very beginning. I want you to push off from the wall, put your face in the water, and your arms above your head like a torpedo. I want to see how far you can glide like that in the water. Just hold your breath.”
He looked at me nervously, put his arms above his head, one foot on the wall and pushed off. Sam’s face was in the water less than two seconds. He quickly stood up and looked around at me.
“Sam, let’s try it again, only this time put your face in the water before you push off, you’ll go farther. Come on, you’ve got this.”
Hesitantly, he assumed the proper position, arms over his head, crouched in the water so his face was close to the surface and quickly pushed off the wall. His face skimmed the top of the water.
Again, he quickly stood up and turned around.
“Sam, are you afraid to put your head in the water?”
“No.”
“Then how come you won’t put your head in the water and hold your breath while you glide?”
“I can’t hold my breath in the water.”
“Oh sure you can! It’s easy. Just do it like this.” And I proceeded to hold my breath under water for a few seconds in demonstration that yes, it was possible.
As I emerged, he looked at me with his big brown eyes. With a bit of fear in his voice he said,
“But I’ll die if I hold my breath in the water!”
“What? What did you say?”
“I’ll die if I hold my breath under water.”
“Sam, you won’t die.”, I assured him.
“Yes, yes I will!”, his emotions getting the better of him.
“Honey, you won’t die. Your body won’t let you. If you held your breath for as long as you could out of the water, you’d pass out and your body would start breathing again. And when you hold your breath under water, you’re body tells you when it’s time to breathe and up you come! I’m right here with you and I’m not leaving.”
He didn’t believe me.
“Sam, I promise you, you won’t die. C’mon, let’s try it again and I’ll hold you while you’re gliding in the water. You’re not going to die, I promise.”
He assumed the glide position, foot on the wall. I had my hands around his waist while he was prone in the water.
“Ok Sam, put your face in the water and push off the wall. I won’t let go.”
He just looked at me.
“I promise, Sam. You’re going to be ok. Just try it.”
He continued to look at me. Trust is hard to muster up when the looming fear feels bigger than any kind of success.
Slowly, he took a breath, held it, put his face in the water and pushed. I held onto him as he glided a few feet and bolted upright, panicked, gulping air.
“You did great!!!!! Did you die?”
“No…”
“Correct! Now let’s do it again!”
This time, there was no hesitancy. He went about just as far but he didn’t bolt up in a panic.
We did this over and over and I never let go while he was holding his breath under water.
Truth overcame his fear and by the end of the class, he was gliding beautifully through the water, holding his breath, without any assistance. This new confidence allowed him the freedom to continue to improve in his swimming progress. Truth had won this battle and Sam was the victor. He could now go on to learn so much more because he had conquered his fear. Sam was no longer listening to the false narrative that created a fear monster. His huge smile at the end of class was evidence of this swimming warrior!
Oft times, as we face our fears, we swear we will die if we have to address them! The enormity of the fear seems insurmountable. Sometimes the enormity is because we have the wrong premise or information. Other times, it’s because we don’t feel capable. Or maybe it’s both.
Acknowledge your struggle and find someone to walk beside you. Someone who will hold on tightly to your hand and not let go until you get to the other side. Someone who will speak truth to you and encourage and support you in the battle.
Also, be on the lookout for those who may need your assuring hand to help them walk through the fear…or swim through the fear. Hold on tight and don’t let go until they have successfully reached the other side. Your small act of kindness may make the difference between the death of a dream or the fruition of a dream!
And just like Sam, once we battle and overcome our fear, we will have the confidence to swim in deeper waters and experience greater success!
